| MCCAIN | "Obama, Clinton, ___ Join Forces to Form Nightmare Ticket" (May 2008 headline in the Onion) |
| GETSTOGETHER | Joins forces to form a band, say (4,8) |
| FBI | ___ Releases List Of Criminals It In No Particular Rush To Track Down (recent headline in The Onion) |
| CEOS | "New Law Forces ___ to Humbly Shrug Before Receiving Massive Bonuses" (headline in the Onion) |
| GOD | "Universe Ends as ___ Wakes Up Next to Suzanne Pleshette" (headline in The Onion) |
| ELON | "___ Musk Debuts New Self-Parenting Child" (May 2020 headline in the Onion) |
| AREAMAN | Local guy who "always thought he'd squander his life differently," per a July 2019 headline in the Onion |
| HED | "Area Man Always Thought ___ Squander His Life Differently" (headline in The Onion) |
| CECIL | Name the lion which hit the headlines in the summer after he was shot dead in Zimbabwe by an American tourist. (5) |
| UNEARTH | Bristol Bears Look To --- Another Rough Diamond, headline in the Bristol Post after Morgan Eames signed from Beziers (7) |
| SCREAMER | Hard strike in football, or sensational headline in the US (8) |
| SCANDALS | 'Caught in Ocean-liner with Gangsters' - the headlines in the tabloids (8) |
| SEVENSAMURAI | Akira Kurosawa's "epic primal myth that pulsates through cinema," per a headline in the Guardian |
| BEATLESBREAKUP | It made headlines in the world of rock in 1970: 2 wds. |
| LEEK | In crop rotation, one of the vegetables typically grown in the onion/allium section of a vegetable patch (4) |
| SKIINGISGOINGDOWNHILL | January pandemic headline in the "Travel & Tourism" section |
| BYLINE | It follows a headline in The Spectator (DAYS) |
| NAMESAKE | Similar title makes an odd headline in the end (8) |
| RENO | "Absolute Power: The Legacy of Corruption in the Clinton-___ Justice Department" by David Limbaugh ( |
| PUNCHLINE | Conductor's strip on the ticket may get a laugh (5,4) |
